Your Boss is Sexist So Deal with It

I have worked for both men and women and I can say without a doubt that any and all bosses are sexist. Their sexism isn’t focused on one gender, however. Men and women are sexist against men and women.


Ladies first:

Female bosses tend to hold a bit of a grudge against their male counterparts who they feel are out to get them, and often take it out on their male subordinates. It’s not surprising since most of the male counterparts are, if fact, raging assholes that can’t stand being equals with someone who can’t pee standing up. So, instead of going home and beating the dog (or more likely cat) they choose to take it out on the men who will sit there and take it. Sorry fellas. But she still will be just as catty about her fat, pretty, slutty, ditzy, friendly female colleagues. You can file them down, but the claws are always out.

Now the boys:

Male bosses will take power trips on other men like they’re earning mileage points for it. Nothing proves you’re more of a man by demeaning one in front of others (I wonder if NBC hands out peacock feathers to their male senior execs.? I digress). Every male boss has done this to his male subordinate at least once in front of the pretty secretary (who they may or may not be fucking). It could be passive aggressive or a full out bitch fest, but they will show the horns when they can. Of course, they will also hold their place in the never-ending workplace boys club. I mean what guy wants to talk sports, cars, home repair, and pussy with a chick? You can take the boy out of the locker room, but you can’t take the locker room out of the boy. Besides, who wants to get slapped with a sexual harassment suit? Sorry ladies, you’re just not worth the risk at the workplace.

So what do you do?

If you’re a guy working for a woman, ask her about her day, weekend, sports (if she’s interested). It’s no different than your mate, just let her talk about herself and she’ll be happy with you. Like your mate, she really doesn’t give a shit about you.

Guy working for another guy? Go out drinking. If you can hang (or pretend to hang) with your alcoholic boss (upper management will always have a drinking problem) you’ll get enough embarrassing info out of him to make him think twice about using you as his whipping boy. Invariably, he’ll let slip which office mate he’s fucked or wants to fuck, or what he thinks of his boss. Just pace yourself so you don’t blurt out something you’ll regret in the morning.

Ladies, if you’re working for another woman, let her know how pretty she is. Men may be able to get away with this, but could cross the line into real or perceived sexual harassment and royally fuck over their entire career (I wouldn’t try it). Ladies, you can get away with this. Basically, make her feel like the prom queen and you’ll escape the claws. If you have a male boss, flirt with him. That’s right, just flirt with him. I’m not suggesting you spread open for him, but subtle flirtation will go a long long way. It doesn’t even matter what you look like. You could have the sex appeal of a manatee, but any attention is good attention in his eyes. After all, the only worth a man cares about is his sexual worth (everything else just feeds this).

No matter what, your boss will unfairly judge you based on his/her and your sexuality. Just use their irrational tendencies to your advantage.